Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Dealing with baby "daddy"

As you all may or may not read before in my other post I am no longer with the father of my child and NOT for reasons society may think. If you feel like finding out why read the above post, it's one of my personal favorites.
For several reasons both emotional and legal he, Leilani's "father", did not sign her birth certificate. What this  means, along with other things, is that getting child support now, that we are no longer together is going to be that much more difficult.
I have been trying to work with him without the court for a while,  to no avail so now my only, and what should have been my FIRST option, is to go through the courts and establish child support.
However, since we do live across the Untied States from one another and his work schedule is not typical it has not been easy getting him served with the child support papers, even though he is well aware that he can go pick them up any time he still hasn't.
So today I called him and TRIED to have a mature ADULT conversation with him which always seems too hard for him to handle and in the end he told me that him picking up the paper work was not his job. I told him that it would probably be in his best interest to get this done and over with and he insisted that he is. ...Now I don't know how blatantly avoiding picking up his documents is getting the process done and over with... In the end of the "conversation" he did what he always does and resorted to name calling, cursing and hanging up the phone. I called him back because there was no resolve and I needed to know if he would work with me to in fact get this all done and over with. Instead he made the mistake of telling me to "come at him."
Now if there is one thing you don't do its tell someone to come at you unless you are truly and fully prepared for what you have just asked for. I informed him that he is not going to like the process and that he is going to possibly dislike me even more by the end of all of this, then as he proceeded to yell obscenities in my ear. I just hung up.
I remember watching an episode of Teen Mom where Maci was obviously upset because Ryan, the father of her son, had not paid her in a timely matter, in the end it was a bank error and the funds where put into her account. My message to her, try going about a YEARS time with absolutely no support from the father of the child and still dealing with his mouth.
Another reason NOT to get pregnant at a young age OR unless you are in a MARRIED committed relationship: Baby "Daddies" You will have to deal with them for the REST OF YOUR LIFE and so far its only been a year and I can't.
If you are currently a teen mom or know one URGE them to have the father of the child sign the birth certificate it may save you and or them a headache in the future.
Once again thank you for reading.