Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Back to School.

Recently I have seen that a lot of teen moms are going back to school! I think it's amazing for anyone to further their education and even more so when one of my peers are doing it.

The common question that we all have when embarking on a new journey without our child is how can I make it more emotionally bareable for me and my child? This got me thinking about what I did and still do to make my time away from Leilani a bit easier. It's wasn't easy leaving her for the first time and it's still tough today however, I realized that one must get creative.

Let your child draw in your notebooks.

Leilani actually came up with this one. It started when she was younger and she would draw in my notebooks without me knowing. Then whenever I'd get to class I'd open my notebook and see a wonderful drawing she drew.
If you're like me then your school supply budget is pretty small but the overwhelming amount of positive emotions you get when you see that drawing supersedes any budget constraint and is totally worth letting your little one go Picasso on your notebook.

Draw on Their Hand

Yes, I know children shouldn't draw on themselves and as a parent we shouldn't encourage it. However, them being away from us is just as tough on them as you being away from them.

I used to draw a heart on one of Leilani's hands and a whichever figure she wanted on the other, be it a butterfly or smiley face. I used to tell her that whenever she began to miss me to look down at her hand and she would be reminded that mommy loves her, is with her and that the other figure was something that makes her happy so she shouldn't be sad. There was a little backfire to this idea, she began drawing on her cousin. Which I thought was awesome because it was karma for my sister drawing on me when I was younger, but she, my sister, used a Sharpie!

Lunch box Message

The first time I packed Leilani a lunch I grabbed a Sharpie and wrote "Mommy Loves Leilani" on the inside flap of her lunch box. She didn't know I wrote it and saw it when she opened her lunch box at lunchtime that day. When she got home she asked me why I did that I told her I did it because I love her and asked is she was okay with it. She said she was okay with it and walk away.
I'm not sure if this one helps her more than me or vis versa. However, in my romanticized thoughts I picture her opening her lunch box seeing the note and smiling. If this really happens... I don't know.

Remember school is an amazing accomplishment and it can get tough.
However, being able to attend your child's games/plays/ recitals will be totally worth it in the future when you are able to put them in these programs with your degree salary rate.


  1. Hi there, visiting from the Massachusetts STEPPS page, and I'm also a former teen parent! I made the decision to go back to school when my daughter was 2 and finally graduated from college last year a week before her 6th birthday. It's tough, but the steps you outlined are a great way to manage. My daughter and I both love when I write her messages in her lunchbox, it's a small gesture that she really appreciates and I LOVE doing :)

    1. CONGRATS!! On both your decision to go back to school and GRADUATING!! I love doing little things like that for her because it lets her know that I'm always thinking about her. Thank you very much for stopping by and reading I truly appreciate it.
      Hopefully we can meet at the annual summit this year!

  2. Hello, I foun out about your blog after reading a comment from you in an article in The Daily News today. I am a former teen mom. It's been quite a while actually. I am 34 & my daughter is 17. We've been through it all. Reading your blog has brought back so many memories, both good and bad. I gave birth to my daughter half way into my senior year of high school. I was able to graduate on time & I took 6 months off before I started
    college. I went on to complete college and medical school. I have been a physician since 2005. I just felt the need to post to encourage you and all the teen moms out there to keep on being good moms and good role models for your kids. The time it takes to complete your education will go by anyway, so you might as well do something constructive with it. If you have any questions about anything. Please do not hesitate to contact me

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