Wednesday, June 26, 2013

TMI Confession: Dating...?

Often people will ask me if I'm dating or seeing anyone. My answer is always no, no, not really interested in dating... until recently.

I find myself missing the feeling of having someone.
Someone to spend time with, hang out with, joke with, you know... all of the things that come along with a healthy adult relationship. I miss it but I'm not sure that I want to even entertain the idea of dating.

Truth is I don't really have free time and if I did I feel spending it on dating would be a waste of time, a distraction, and this whole idea is so strange to me! I don't know how to deal with the feelings that I'm trying to not feel. LOL.

People tell me it's okay to feel like this. It's been years since I officially left Leilani's father not including the months before separating that I found myself not liking/loving him.

But it all seems too complicated. The complicatedness (is that a word) of just thinking about it is enough to make me not want to entertain the idea. LOL.

I think for now I am going to keep trying to ignore the feelings.
That sounds like a better idea.

I'm a mess. 

What do you think? Is it time?